When it comes to buying a mattress, there are really only two things* to consider: how big, and how soft?
How big is easy. Pick based on room size, and how far away you want to be from your partner.
How soft… now that’s more difficult. And it makes a huge difference. A mattress is a big investment for your home, and can last 10 years. So how do you get it right?
*(Yes I appreciate there’s also the question of pocket sprung vs foam etc, but given most modern mattresses are now a foam or hybrid design, and this construction largely affects softness anyway, it’s a secondary factor).
How to pick your mattress softness
Go down to Dreams or Bensons for Beds and lie on lots of mattresses. There is no better way. Ignore all other advice.
Here’s a list of Dreams stores.
We were on the verge of buying a mattress online. I can’t remember the brand, but you know the thing: ‘80% off for a limited time only, 180 day return policy’.
My finger hovered over the ‘buy now’ button. Then, I hesitated. I don’t know why. I’d had terrible neck pain from an old mattress, which was now shaped like one of those sinkholes you see on the internet. What if I bought badly? That’s 10 years of sinkhole ahead of me, I thought.
‘Love,’ I said, ‘what about a day out to Dreams? In Deptford?’
So we lay on a lot of mattresses. And we found one we liked.
They also have a special Sleepmatch machine. We didn’t try this, but lots of people did, and they seemed happy. As I say, it’s a day out, isn’t it.
Types of mattress softness
Mattresses range from soft to extra firm. I lay on all shades of softness and this how I saw it:
- Soft: unbelievably soft
- Medium: soft
- Medium-firm: quite soft
- Firm: just right
- Extra firm: also nice, but a bit more niche and less choice.
So it turns out we preferred firm (stop it). And actually this was a really important point.
If you read the small print, almost all of these online mattress companies – Casper, Emma, Eve, Duncan (I made one of those up) – sell medium-firm mattresses. They’re almost all one type. Maybe – though I have no evidence for this – made in the same factory. So I, as a firm guy, would have been quite unhappy.
Go to Dreams and lie on lots of mattresses. I beg you.
Are online mattresses any good then?
Yes, they’re good. I worked with a guy who used to test all the new mattress brands and he liked them. And that was his real, down-the-pub opinion, not just as a mouthpiece of Big Mattress.
If you like medium-firm foam or hybrid mattresses, and you find a good deal online, and their customer service is good, go for it.
Obviously, a ‘good deal’ here is tricky. They’re always a ‘good deal’. The reason you see so many online mattress companies is because their margins are high, leaving them a lot to spend on marketing. And they all use ‘limited time’ deals, and some of them have got in trouble for it, such as here and here.
So don’t just weigh the price up against other online mattresses – judge them against bricks and mortar ones too.
Is memory foam worth it?
It’s lovely, but expensive.
It’s also not a simple question. There are lots of types of foam, many of which advertise their memories.
However, the market leader is TEMPUR. They have proper memory foam mattresses. It’s their own formula, no-one else has it. And honestly, I loved it.
But my wife didn’t. And neither did my wallet. Twice the price, roughly.
Is it better to go too hard or too soft with a mattress?
Too hard. You can always soften a mattress with a mattress topper. You can’t firm one up.
Now for some reason I fancy a warm bowl of porridge.
